Pearl's father, or at least the man she always knew as her father is not her biological father and she realizes through this story that her mother made choices in life that caused her great pain but later found someone who would love Pearl as his own and raise her as such (Tan, 2006).

After hearing her mother's life story Pearl gains a tremendous respect for what her mother has gone through and a renewed sense of appreciation for her own husband and children.

It is interesting to note that through it all her mother holds onto her Chinese heritage and customs. One might think that after all the abuse and sadness that Winnie suffered at the hands of her first husband she would want to move as far away as possible from that culture, but instead she seems stuck in it, unable to break free. At the same time however, throughout the story one cannot help but wonder if part of her anger at Pearl is less about the fact that her daughter does not hold to the old customs but about the fact that Pearl is able to adapt to America's customs and not worry about the customs of the old country. There may be an underlying resentment there that is not fully explored in the book.

While their lives and ideas seem to be completely different,...

While Pearl has a loving family and good husband she finds herself relating to her mother as a young girl and young adult in needing to escape because on a much smaller less dramatic scale Pearl had the need to escape her mother's constant nagging, diligence and insistence that Pearl follow the old customs even in America.
The most significant lesson of this story is that mothers and daughters will always have issues to work through simply because of the generational differences they experience. Another valuable lesson of this story is to never assume anything about anybody. Pearl made assumptions and based her feelings about her mother on those assumptions and it turned out that she did not have any idea who her mother was and what she herself had been through.

Mothers and daughters will always have a bond and that bond will be stretched, tested and threatened periodically through life but it can never be completely destroyed.

REFERENCE

Tan, Amy. (2006)the Kitchen God's Wife (Paperback)

Penguin (Non-Classics)